"Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world." – Jack Nicholson
The lovely folks over at Vat19.com were nice enough to send me a review copy of one of their more interesting drinking products. While I personally am a huge advocate of the Spiegelau IPA glass and other beer-specific drinking vessels, I have always wondered what kind of glass could be the perfect “Bad-Day-at-Work” glass. Well, after a particularly difficult day I sat down to the lovely Vat19 Das Beer Boot and gave it a shot. Would this boot make my day better? Would it enhance the beer I was consuming? Or would it simply make it easier for me to get a hangover? While I might not be hungover this morning, I can say without a doubt that the novelty of drinking out of a glass boot is fun enough to make the Das Beer Boot one of my favorite beer containers.
Drinking from a glass boot made for beer is not something to take lightly. While I did enjoy every moment I drank from the foot chalice, I of course understood greatly the gravity of the situation. This boot represented the pinnacle of human achievement. For years we as humans have dreamed of a beverage container that resembled a body part. Drinking from a boot means you are drinking like a man, a man who just killed someone and cut off their foot and is now drinking out of it like a manly monster. This is the drinking vessel of choice for people like Hans Landa, George Clooney and Olivia Wilde. This is not something to joke about, this is a very serious honor.
Before I was to drink of the foot of life I first had to battle the creature that lived in the shipping container. As soon as I cut the box open, a Griffin made entirely out of flames and the tears of orphans attacked me and tried to bite me in the face. A swift dodge to the right and a powerful uppercut rendered the demon beast defenseless, and utilizing the included Sword of Judgement (which is also magnetic, thanks Vat19) I slay the beast and wore its skin as a mighty vest. Not a lame vest, but a mighty vest that was one size too small but I didn’t care, the demon beast was dead and I was drinking beer out of a beer boot. And yes, I did decide to review it, not just display it next to my other many trophies (of which I have many).
The Vat19 Das Beer Boot is a hand-blown glass boot that is about 9.5 inches tall and 5.5 inches deep. The website says it can hold anywhere between 40-48 ounces of delicious beer, mine fell in the 40 oz range. While not having a consistent size for the beer boot may concern some people, please remember that this is entirely hand-made by a skilled beer boot craftsman and if you do not like his work it hurts his feelings. Besides; why would you ever need a guaranteed 48 ounces of beer?
The boot is heavy and sturdy (not too heavy for demon beast slayers), the hand-blown glass does an admirable job holding the weight of the beer and not feeling dainty about it. I did not attempt to test its durability, but I am sure that it could survive being knocked over on the counter more than a few times. With the boot being as big as it is I did find drinking out of it to be less than ideal, but honestly I was drinking three beers at once and I needed to not cry about it. The thick walls of the glass along with a rather sharp edge made consuming the beer less comfortable than most beer glasses, but I was simply having too much fun to really care all that much about it. This is not a glass to improve the flavor and aroma of your favorite brews. This is a freakin boot to help navigate beer from your hand to your tummy.
One thing I really appreciated about the boot was how long the beer managed to stay cold. 40 ounces of beer can understandably take longer to consume than a simple 12 ounce beer, but the thick walls of the Das Beer Boot made the beer stay nice and chilly for the entire consumption process. It took me about 60 minutes of sipping to finish my first round and I can honestly say the last sip was only slightly warmer than the first. Bravo on that one. Although my second round did get warmer due to all of the fire-breathing dragons I kept slaying with my spare hand.
While a giant glass beer boot might seem like a novelty… okay it is a novelty but it is a FUN novelty. Beer boots make social gatherings (or playing Mass Effect alone in the dark) much more fun and at the low price of $14.99 you can buy as many or as few as you like. They come well packed in layers of Styrofoam cardboard and bubble wrap so there is no worry of them breaking in transit. They are hand-wash only so please do not put them in your dishwasher, for I am sure they would break whatever kind of dishwasher you have. Your Kenmore will never hold the glory of the beer boot.
Overall I really love the Das Beer Boot. It is impractical, oversized, slightly uncomfortable and outright encourages bad behavior- all things I appreciate. While I will not just tell you to go buy one right now, I will ask you: do your friends own a Das Beer Boot? Do you want to make them jealous? Or even more importantly- do you want to look as amazingly awesome as this?
Thats what I thought. Click here to purchase the Vat19 Das Beer Boot.